2015 in review // What I hope 2016 will bring

This year has been one of the best fucking years I've had. I mean it hasn't been 100% positive, but what's happiness without a few bumps on the way? But here's some of the things that's happened this year:

• I've met new people who have become close friends of mine (Marina, Ramsey, Dany, Samantha, Nikita, Louise, all of you lovelings <3)
• I've made stronger bonds with people 
• I've gained more confidence 
• I started school after 3 years of sickness
• I'm getting good grades and teachers are very happy to have me 
• I've been reading a lot more books 
• I got turned down by something that could change my life 
• My room got a make over 
• I've taken public transport on my own 
• I've been in The Rainbow at aRos - ANd WALKEd AROUNd WITHOUT dYING
• I've found a thirst for adventures and exploring myself and the world around me 
• I had my heart broken by a friend 
• I got my first tattoo 
• I spent my birthday with a lot of people I love 
• I've only had two panic attacks since October 2014 (!!!!!!!!!)
• I've "cleaned out" people from my life who only brought negativity
• I went on holiday and didn't have to have a "break" day
• I've given many new plants a forever home
• August 2015 marks one year of having Lui 
• I've fully come out as bisexual
• My levels of fucks given about most things have dropped so much

And so many other things has happened during this year!!! It's been a really good year. I haven't been this happy for as long as I remember. I've moved so much personally and mentally, I feel like a new person. My mental illness doesn't control my life any more, it's still a part of my life, but I'm in control. Just ugh, I could cry with how happy I am!!!

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2016 is promising. I've stopped believing in New Years resolutions because I can never fulfill them, but here's some things I hope will happen/I hope I will make happen, in the new year!

• Get another tattoo
• Experiment with my hair
• Travel a bit
• Complete my first year in school and pass all my exams (bonus: hopefully will good grades)
• Become more body positive
• Continue to do my best to support my friends and be better at reminding them that I love them and their qualities
• Get better at eating healthier and plan lunches and meals better
• Appreciate everyone around me, remind them of my appreciation for them and what they do for me
• Sing more
• Read more
• Create more
• Get more plants c:
• Have fun and be happy

What's your hopes for the new year? Stay safe, drink responsibly, have safe sex and kiss some gorgeous people! Oh, and eat loads of food <3

Why having "adulter" friends is absolutely necessary

I'm an adult, I'm 21, I've been legally an adult for a few years now, but having people who are a lot older than you as friends is really necessary to grow into an even better adult.

I have two friends who are twice my ages. My (friend and) mentor Lene, who used to be an education counsellor at my school, and my friend Klaus who used to run the group project I was a part of from last year to June this year.

Lene has followed me since I was a teenage, and has been my rock through difficult times. She's helped me so much and helped me grow into a stronger and happier person. She's like an extra (younger) grandmother, her and her husband frequently invite me over for tea and have a nice long chat. She's such an open and understanding person. I love her to death, I wouldn't know what to do without her.

Klaus is a bit younger than my mum. During the group project we developed a tight bond, I see him as an older brother I can joke with and seek advice from. We tease each other (well mostly I tease him) and joke around, but I know I can call him if anything's up at any time of the day. If I'm stuck in the middle of the night, he'll not hesitate to come get me. And I take care of him too. He's a bit of a stressy person, billion things on his mind, becomes easily restless and forgets things. So I'll have to step in, remind him to breathe and maybe eat a little bit. Again, I love him to death and someone I wouldn't want to be without.

The reason people like this are so important in this phase of your life, is because they've been through it. Surely through a different time, but the problems are alike. Confusion with what to do with your life, am I progressing at the right speed, am I behind in life? Reassurance and help from people who's been through it and give their take on what to do and what not to do, but being open about it.

And they don't judge you in the same way a family member would. I can tell them everything like I would with a friend my own age, but you get a different view on it. It's so refreshing, because it's sometimes not very helpful talking to people with the same problems. I have a few friends who are also uncertain about what to study in uni, if that's even what they want.

So, if you don't have an adulter friend, I hope you find one. They're gold.

SURPRISE! I'm 21 now

The 18th of March I turned 21. But let's rewind to the day before, the 17th. I was peacefully (well, more like stressing) baking my arse off for my birthday, a few eggs landed on my clothes, flour everywhere, a needy dog demanding love while my muffins nearly burnt in the oven. I knew I was going to get a present that day because Sean had been bugging me with it for months now! I had no idea what he had planned, it could be anything to be honest.

So while I was making the final batch of cake, my mum comes home and tells me to go look in the hallway for my present. I'm a bit confused, why didn't she just bring it in? Is it so big she can't just put it on the table while I finish off my cakes? So I slowly walk to the hallway and my mum is grinning and there he fucking is. Sean fucking came to celebrate me on my fucking birthday.

He spend all the time he was here BULLYING me with the face I made when I saw him. I couldn't believe he was there, I touched his face all "Is this the real life? Is this just fantasy?". I think the bit he found the funniest was me touching his face all "Are you sure you're here???"

I was so happy to see him. I had tears building up in my eyes, this is the first time in 6 years he's been able to be with me on my birthday. And my history with good birthdays isn't that good. Last year I had a massive panic attack because people kept talking about how my old dog Buster would probably soon die. The year before also haunted by anxiety and what not. But this year was different.

On my actual birthday I had a bunch of friends coming over for breakfast. I was so happy that they without a doubt came to celebrate with me. It was so fun to have my family and Sean meet them. I even cried a tiny bit when everyone left because I felt so loved and cared for, having such good friends near me.

Later on the day the rest of my family came and we had cakes and ate the most amazing dinner together! Again, I was so overwhelmed with happiness because I had almost everyone I love with me on my birthday.

Tak til jer alle hvis I læser det her. Jeg må nok indrømme at det er jeres skyld at jeg havde den BEdSTE fødseldag ♡


                                                 

The little things

Credit (x)

Buying flowers for yourself. Making your favourite meal. Nice fruits on offer. Getting a package you've been waiting for in the mail. Someone buying you a small gift because they thought of you. Taking your bra off after a long day. That feeling of freshness after you brushed your teeth. A kiss from a cute dog. Clothes fresh from the dryer. Finally organising that folder you've been meaning to for ages. Finding the missing sock. Watching the clock go 11:11:11. Having just the right amount of money on hand for your groceries. The smell of old books. Fitting perfectly on your love's chest. Remembering someone's special day without the use of calenders on phones. Getting offered the last piece of cake. Feeling the cold rain on your feet. Fresh and clean sheets on your bed. Thinking of someone and then getting a message from them short after. The sound of opening a bar of chocolate. Kittens wanting to play with your hair. Finishing a good book. Looking through old photo albums. Re-watching shows you loved as a child. Strangers smiling at you. Kind bus drivers. Writing with your favourite pen. Hot beverages on a cold day. Someone asking how you are and being generally interested. Picking up the last of an item you wanted in a shop. The pretty evening sky. Being offered a seat on the train. Being on time for appointments. Giving your room a good tidy. Finally throwing out/donating the things you really don't need. Newly done nails. Putting on new PJs. Finding something you lost a while ago. The smell of freshly cut grass. Catching up with friends. Sleeping in. Stealing the duvet from your love. Being right about something. Sneezing after it being stuck for a bit.